The Gifted Pig

A traveling salesman visits a rural farmhouse. As he finishes his sales pitch to the family, a pig with two wooden legs limps across the living room floor. Surprised, the salesman asks, “Why does the pig have two wooden legs?”

The farmer replies, “Let me tell you about that pig. I was out on the east forty a year or two ago, and my tractor turned over. I was pinned underneath it – there was fuel dripping onto the ground all around me, and it was about to explode. But that there pig, he ran all the way into town, and brought the sheriff and his boys out here to rescue me. Lemme tell you, that’s some pig.”

“Yes,” says the salesman, “but why does it have two wooden legs”

“Well, listen, that pig is somethin’ else. We was all asleep one night when the shades in this here room caught fire. There was flames sweepin’ through the house. We wuz all dead asleep, but that there pig, he smelt the smoke and ran squealin’ through the house. Woke us all up, he did, and saved the day. Why, that pig even ran back into the burnin’ buildin’ an’ dragged Baby Bobby Joe from his crib t’ safety. By gee whiz, there ain’t no other pig like that pig!”

“Yeah, yea,” says the salesman, “but why does the pig have two wooden legs?”

“Well, now,” says the farmer, “a pig that special, you wouldn’t wanna eat all at once!”

Adapted from Carroll, Noel. Humour: A Very Short Introduction. Oxford, UK: Oxford University Press, 2014.